Why Does He Do That? – Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
By: Lundy Bancroft, 2003
Why Does He Do That? has become the most read book in the US on abusive relationships. The author, Lundy Bancroft, has spent the last 17 years of his career specializing in domestic abuse and the behaviour of abusive men.
If you are trying to understand the experience you are in or have been through, this book will be an enormous help. It can provide you with a way out of the fog, as this book delineates the complexities of the abusive situation and the subtleties and strategies of the abusive mind. You will find your experience being validated.
If you are a friend or family member of someone who has experienced domestic abuse but don’t understand the situation as the abuser is so ‘charming’ and has ‘always been nice to me’ then this is the book for you. It will help you understand the nature and intricacies of the Dr. Jekyll / Mr. Hyde character and how abusive behaviours are hidden from the general public but have devastating effects on their target.
Chapters include:
The Nature of Abusive Thinking
- the mystery,
- the mythology,
- the abusive mentality,
- the types of abusive men.
Abusive Men in Relationships
- how abuse starts,
- the abusive man in everyday life,
- the abusive man and sex,
- drug and alcohol addiction and leaving an abusive man.
Abusive Men in the World
- abusive men as parents,
- abusive men and their allies,
- the abusive man and the legal system.
Changing the Abusive Man
- the making of an abusive man,
- the process of change,
- creating an abuse free world.
Finally, the author challenges those who are trying to remain ‘neutral’ towards both members of a couple when domestic abuse has occurred.
‘To remain neutral is to collude with the abusive man, whether or not that is your goal.’
Friends, family and the church must be willing to stand alongside an abused woman and say ‘this is not ok’ and then step up and provide appropriate support.
To purchase press here. (Approx £12 new or £6 used.)